March Madness

Martini, Simone
(circa 1280-1344)
Italian painter one of the most original
and influential artists of the Sienese school.

"Our awareness is all that is alive and maybe sacred in any of us. Everything else about us is dead machinery."
(Kurt Vonnegut, Breakfast of Champions)

We are not the only discombobulated ones.
We note that the glorious Jessica of GO FUG YOURSELF has recently suffered her own rageaholism relapse.

We also note that according to the Astrology Zone, March will be a tough month filled with eclipses and pitfalls and - well - let's just say, "Yes you should just buy a case of Vodka and shut yourself up for the rest of the month."

But see the problem with the "Breakfast of Champions*" solution is the weight gain and even though a C of V will help you get through a moody March, spring is just around the corner and alcohol bloat is never attractive, especially in sundress-cardigan weather.

So, how then should we duck out and wait for this ugly celestial time to end? Well, there are vitamins of course, and herbs obviously - but we have a better suggestion.

Let's all write to our elected officials and tell them:
THE PEOPLE ARE AGAINST THE INVASION OF IRAN...

You see this is our biggest fear -
The Bush Administration considers March '06 to be
Invade Iran Month.

So here's the plan.
Write to your congressperson and then buy the Kettle One, get some olives, stock up on V-8 and horseradish and maybe, maybe the worst we will have to deal with this March is a hangover, a bloated, splotchy face and the discovery that yes Virginia, vodka does smell.

*If Queenie's Daughter's recollection is correct the Breakfast of Champions according to K. Vonnegut was a gin martini, consumed in the lobby or bar of some hotel in the book of the same name...